my mom's fourth trip to Melbourne!

After my trip to Manila with Arden, my mom flew back with us to Melbourne for a week-long visit - her fourth one, in the 3.5 years we've lived here! 

We always love it when my mom visits - she wants to spend as much time as she can with Arden, even if that means rocking her from 4am on and holding her for all her naps.

My mom's visit coincided with Mother's Day, which was really special. We all went out for high tea at a nearby bakery and cafe, and then my mom watched Arden while Ben and I got some quality alone time in the city.

at high tea for Mother's Day

During the week, my mom got to visit Arden's special activities - swim lessons, music class, and songbirds at the library. Arden's inquisitive and joyful personality really shines during these events, and my mom loved watching her in these different social environments.

Arden is obsessed with climbing up and down and up and down stairs, my mom learned.

the toddlers always get a bee stamp after music class. my mom got one too!

Arden was much more receptive about having my mom around this time (during her previous visit last December, Arden was still very clingy with us), even asking for her and not batting an eyelash when I left the room or even the apartment. After the visit, Arden did ask for her Ahma occasionally. She wasn't sad about it - although I'm sure that will come later, someday when Arden is able to learn the different types of goodbyes and the weights of each one. 

At least this goodbye is a pretty short one - in August Arden and I will be heading to Michigan for three weeks to visit my parents and brother. Afterwards, we'll meet Ben in Seattle to spend two weeks with his families. We're very excited to see everyone again, especially now that Arden is a lot better at meeting new people - and not, say, bawling every time someone smiles at her, like our visit last year.

Thanks to my mom for another wonderful visit to Melbourne - we'll see you soon!

CK

Manila 2017.

Back in 2014, Ben and I had the chance to visit Manila to see my grandmother, who had been in poor and declining health. Three years later, my Amah is still with us, and I had the opportunity to take Arden to meet her Thai-Ma (great-grandmother) as well as celebrate her 100th birthday (according to the traditional Chinese custom of counting). 

Fun family fact: for my maternal grandparents, I'm grandchild #19, while Arden is great-grandchild #19. How cool is that?

I was pretty anxious about the 9.5-hour* plane ride with Arden, who is now 18 months old and loves to run around - but everything went smoothly, and there were no massive meltdowns (from either of us!). As we were exiting the plane in Manila, a passenger actually commented on how well Arden did during the flight. Of course, Arden immediately started screeching and making a fuss, but by then we were on our way to the baggage claim!

(*I think the flight was actually 8+ hours, as our departure was delayed by an hour. or something.)

here we go!

The five-day visit was mostly a blur of wonderful family reunions and delicious meals, alternating with long nauseating car rides. The traffic in Manila is horrendous, and the experience was magnified by a toddler who isn't used to cars or car seats. I'm also realising that because we always use public transportation in Melbourne, I'm no longer used to riding in cars - so I feel a lot more nauseous during car rides now. Awesome.

Arden did remarkably well for the drastic change in temperature, culture and environment - however, it was still a hard adjustment for her. Throughout the trip she refused to eat, or sit anywhere but in my arms 95% of the time. My mom and other relatives were more than happy to hold Arden and play with her, but she wanted none of it - unless I was out of sight.

the piano my mother practiced on as a child!

meeting my cousin's chihuahua, Katniss. 

My relatives loved meeting Arden in person, and commented on how her white/Caucasian features made her an "American baby". Which, I mean, they're not entirely wrong...? ;) (another fun fact: I'm pretty sure Arden is the first not-entirely-Asian person on my side of the family - very exotic!) Arden got to meet some of her second cousins, and had a cute playdate with Nutmeg (my cousin Beverly's daughter), who matches Arden in intensity and fierce personality.

at Arden's playdate with Nutmeg

with my cousin Dawn, dressed in red for my grandma's birthday party.

Arden meeting more of her second cousins.

Seeing my grandmother in her ailing condition was very hard. She sleeps for most of the day, and I was told that her awake-ness and awareness during this visit (a few minutes here and there) was rare and very special. Due to distance, culture and language, I've never had a close personal relationship with any of my grandparents - but I do have vivid memories of them from when they were healthy, and it's always very emotional to see a relative in declining health.

My grandmother has lived a long and wonderful life, and I was grateful for the chance to celebrate this with many of my aunts, uncles, cousins and other relatives. And of course, I was grateful that my grandmother was finally able to meet my daughter - her 19th great-grandchild.

visiting my grandma at her dialysis treatment.

Many thanks to my extended family for hosting us, helping out with Arden, and for making this trip possible.

CK

taking off from Manila.

Manila - May 2017 from Candice Kortlever on Vimeo.

random summer 2017 updates.

Summertime was wonderful, but now it's more than officially over and we're heading into Autumn. Here are some random updates before I forget everything:

I'm upped my stay-at-home-mom game and registered Arden for music and swim classes - just the beginning of my journey into tiger motherhood! (Just kidding. I couldn't even if I wanted to.) It's been really great having diverse and exciting activities for her to experience every week. It also keeps me sane, to have some semblance of a weekly schedule. Arden especially loves the stimulation of being around other children, pointing to anyone under the age of 16 and saying "BABY! BABY!" (although one time she pointed at an old man pulling a shopping trolley, so maybe it's time to narrow down her definition of "baby"?).  There are also a bunch of free children's activities to attend every week around the city - playgroup, library song circle, and the State Library of Victoria's "Baby Bounce" which is much less violent than it sounds.

Arden's playgroup buddies.

Sleep remains our biggest issue with Arden. I know that someday we'll look back on these days and wish our parenthood problems were this simple again! But sleep is one of the foundations for general health, and the days are no fun when everyone in the family is rocking some serious eye-bags. Throughout the night, Arden relies on a combination of me nursing her and Ben rocking her to fall asleep, and sometimes she is wide awake for hours at a time (we've seen the moments between 1 and 5am way too many times this year!). This was unfortunate for me earlier this month when Ben spent a week traveling for work...

Arden is still 100% reliant on me for her afternoon nap (yes, we're down to one - and yes, I am probably one of the few mothers who is actually happy about this!), but recently I put my foot down and stopped bouncing her in her baby carrier, as it was giving me some serious physical pain (she's not a 7-pound infant anymore, I guess). So now I currently nurse her continuously for her naps in the glider chair, which isn't quite the "me time" I'd like, but it's a lot easier on my back, feet, shoulders and knees.

Summertime in Melbourne means various city-wide festivals, such as White Night (the now-fourth year of all-night culture and light exhibits), and the Moomba Festival (the Labour Day long weekend festival of rides, games, waterskiing competitions and the Bird Man Rally where people raise money for charity by plunging into the river in elaborate "flying" costumes). White Night is probably my favourite festival ever, with its unique light installations and the concentrated timeframe (7pm-7am!). Although the past two years our experience has been more like "White Twilight". Our baby may rebel against sleep, but we still try to keep a consistent bedtime for her and usually head home at around 9pm.

the Royal Exhibition Hall has the coolest light shows

a water-skier doing some tricks on the Yarra River

Last month, our friends Randall and Liz came to visit us for a week, which was so fun! We weren't sure how Arden would act upon meeting them (for the second time - she first met them when we visited Seattle last year), as sometimes she gets really intimidated by new people and clutches my torso like a terrified koala. But she warmed up surprisingly fast, and within minutes of their arrival she was dancing around with Liz, playing catch, giggling, and knocking down Randall's domino towers in record time.

enjoying the company of her new friends

We tried to show the Yoakums everything we could around our city and beyond, and they were thankfully very game for tons of walking (we racked up a LOT of miles on Liz's FitBit - around 13 miles one day, which is pretty much a half marathon!), a long day of car travel (with a baby that has historically done Very Badly in cars) and all the random stuff that comes up when traveling with kids. We took them to the usual city offerings (Flinders Station, Federation Square, the stadiums, the Shrine of Remembrance, Birrarung Marr, etc.), took trams to St. Kilda and Fitzroy, rode the train to Geelong for a day, and hired a car for a trip to see the Twelve Apostles along the Great Ocean Road.

tourists. haha.

watching the windsurfers in St. Kilda

one of the highlights of our great Great Ocean Road road trip!

Having Randall and Liz in town was such a treat. Even though we've gotten to know some really lovely locals here, there's nothing quite like catching up with old friends who hail from back home and share some good history with you (Randall and Ben were roommates in college). Conversation comes naturally, old inside jokes are revived while new ones take root, and Cards Against Humanity is still as hilarious and hysterical as ever - even when you're trying not to wake the baby two rooms over.

As I watched Arden playing with Randall and Liz throughout that week, I felt a bit sad that most of our families won't be able to experience her at this exact age - running around but still a little unsteady on her feet, constantly dancing and asking for "la-la" (that's her word for "music"), learning how to throw plastic balls around the apartment and cuddling her plush toys (her favourites are Deadpool and Pikachu - an eclectic combination). Hopefully our next visit to the States isn't too far off, but by then Arden will be onto the next stage. And hopefully it's not the Terrible Twos...!

our little girl is growing so fast!

CK

summer australian travels 2016.

So far, having a baby hasn't stopped us from taking some pretty big trips, both internationally and domestically. This summer (or winter, depending on where you are!) we got to cross two cities off our "Australian travel" list: Sydney in December, and Perth over the New Year holiday.

our little jet-setter at the airport.

For a more in-depth read about our travels, here are Ben's blog posts for Sydney and Perth. For a less well-thought-out perspective, read on:

Sydney

Sydney and Melbourne have one of those ongoing city rivalries (much like Seattle vs. Portland, I guess? or Boston vs. New York? Gotham vs. Metropolis?) and are always vying for the "Best Australian City" title. So, as a resident of Melbourne, I will choose my words carefully.

Sydney was pretty cool.

Granted, we were only there for a few days and did mostly touristy stuff near the harbour, but we had a wonderful time. I have a weakness for iconic skylines, and Sydney definitely has one of those. Between the opera house, harbour bridge, the tower, and beautiful water everywhere - there's a cool view to see in every direction.

cool view #1

cool view #2

cool view #3: from the Sydney Harbour Bridge

Both the Tauranga Zoo and the Royal Botanic Garden had much to offer in terms of animals and plants, and also had beautiful views of the city skyline. I'd definitely recommend those.

We were a bit spoiled during this trip, because my mom came with us and helped out a lot with Arden. She took her during the earlier mornings (adjoining hotel rooms for the win!) and babysat while Ben and I took some walks alone - once across the Sydney Harbour Bridge, and an evening stroll to see the waterfront at night.

Sydney has a beautiful waterfront and iconic landmarks - I'm glad we made the trip, and would love to make another one in the future!

Perth

Fun fact: Perth is a big part of why we got married. Seriously.

We had been dating for around two years in 2011, when Ben's job sent him to the world's second most isolated city for a month. When he came back, we had this conversation:

Ben: "I had a great time in Perth! Australia is so cool. I really want to live there, maybe for a few years. And I really want you to come with me."
Candice: "Sounds good to me! But you know that won't fly with my ultra-conservative parents. They're going to want us to get married." (I later confirmed this with them.)
Ben: "..."

 And there you have it. Pretty romantic, right?

One of our daily Skype calls while Ben was in Perth in 2011. He was showing me the blue Australian sky. 

But hey, here we are - married and living abroad in Australia! Everyone wins, sort of.

Our week in Perth was enough time for us to see the touristy stuff, some not-as-touristy stuff, and I even got to spend a few hours by the pool while Ben gave the baby a nap.

the glass bridge in Kings Park

"but Perth, let me take a selfie" - haha I'M SO CLEVER. clever Kortlever. you don't get it? that's ok.

Highlights included Kings Park, Fremantle, and the Perth Zoo. Similar to Sydney's Tauranga Zoo, we arrived at this zoo via ferry ride, which is always a magical start to any visit. We loved the creative nature-y layout, and during our visit we saw a lot of awesome animals in awake and alert states - including a mother and twin baby pygmy marmosets. OH MY CUTENESS. I don't have a photo because I was too busy taking a video (which you can see here at 1:04).

We dedicated a day to visiting Rottnest Island, a prime destination for Perth tourists. Going to Rotto requires a really bumpy boat ride not for the faint of heart - on both trips, the crew person handing out barf bags mid-voyage kept falling on top of people seated near the aisle, so that was fun.

family photo on Rottnest

Anyway, Rottnest had beautiful views and adorable quokkas. We did some biking, which was a lot of fun (and it brought back fond memories of my childhood and how much I used to love biking until I kept falling and scraping my knees and tearing holes in my favourite pants). But for two days after our biking adventure, my thighs were on FIRE even though we didn't really do any massive hills. I'm getting older, I guess.

"is that fire I smell?"

Perth was a wonderful trip and a great way to start 2017. I can see why Ben loved his time there five years ago, but I'm glad his job ultimately brought him to Melbourne.

quintessential "LOOK AT ME I WANDERLUST" photo op

Travelling with a baby is a bit different than travelling without one, I'll just say that. There's the obvious: packing more food/books/diapers/plush friends; figuring out sleeping arrangements for a baby that hates all sleeping arrangements; having to be a lot more flexible with the daily itinerary in case of, well, everything. But for me, the biggest difference is that I don't enjoy myself as much during the trip - rather, I enjoy the fond memories afterwards, basking in accomplishment and relief at the end of the day.

Flying with Arden was challenging when she was an infant, but toddlers are a different thing altogether - mostly because they're more mobile and a lot louder and more opinionated. Arden had a few fantastic meltdowns during some of the flights, and has yet to be completely lured by the entertainment screens or bribery.

I really hope Arden is a better flyer in a few months, because she and I are going to Manila in May for my grandmother's 100th birthday, and I'll be flying alone with her on the way there! My mother is flying back to Melbourne with us (for her fourth visit... !), so we've got some more fun adventures to look forward to soon.

CK

seymour.

Back in 2014, we did a lot of traveling to small towns around Victoria. Mostly for work - Ben's job took him all around the state for a few weeks at a time, and I was able to follow him around, exploring and documenting. We stayed in places like Shepparton, Donald, Portland, Penshurst, Metung, Lakes Entrance, Bairnsdale, and Geelong, and on the weekends we were able to visit amazing areas like Cape Bridgewater, Mount Gambier, the Buchan Caves, Raymond Island, and Grampians National Park. Some of these locations were more picturesque than others, but all in all - I love exploring small Australian towns.

This month, Ben was scheduled to spend a week in Seymour - about a 1.5 hour drive from Melbourne. It was actually his suggestion that we come along. Arden has a lot of trouble settling to sleep without her Dada (a welcome change from the first year of her life, when it was mostly Mama doing the night-settling!), and he didn't want to leave her for a full week. "Plus, I'd miss you guys too much," he insisted. I swear I'm not making this up.

visiting Dada at work

Our hotel! Just kidding. It's an old jail, preserved for historical purposes.

I really enjoyed our time in Seymour. It's located on the banks of the Goulburn river, a beautiful spot. Along the river is an easy trail that spans 4.5 km, which was perfect for my morning runs with Arden in her stroller.

Trail jogging.

Arden is 100% walking now, so it's really fun to take her to children's parks - which Seymour had plenty of. There were a few small ones scattered throughout town, a fun park by the old black vintage train near the Seymour train station, and a really cool one at the Goulburn River Tourist Park that had lots of fun play equipment including a baby climbing wall. Of course, Arden had no interest in most of it. Her current favourite park activity is grabbing a bunch of woodchips and throwing them up in the air. But it makes her very happy!

Sprinkled around Seymour are tanks and a helicopter on display, mostly as part of a Vietnam war memorial, and also due to its location near a large Australian army base. The Vietnam Veterans Commemorative Walk is a curved wall of names and photographs, and is reportedly the only one of its kind in Australia dedicated to Vietnam veterans. I really appreciate and enjoy visiting all of the war memorials found in Australia's towns, and this one was especially creative and powerful.

the Vietnam Veterans Commemorative Walk

Seymour has a few quaint art galleries, which I enjoyed walking through during one of Arden's naps. The gallery at the old post office features works from Australian artists, most of them for sale. Across the street is the Seymour Art Society, a gallery located in an old courthouse.

Pioneer Park is an old cemetery, featuring large headstones from long, long ago. It's located in a quiet and peaceful area, with a dirt path meandering around clusters of graves and memorial stones.

this headstone caught my attention - a three-year old boy, memorialised by his grieving parents in the 1800's.

a memorial dedicated to the pioneers of Seymour

I also happened to pass by Victoria's Tidiest Street in 1997 and 1998. This alone made the trip to Seymour worth it.

Agriculture is big in Seymour, and we saw a few farm animals in peoples' yards - mostly sheep, and one adorable little horse. I pointed them out to Arden, who is beginning to enjoy animals that aren't puppies or seagulls. We also saw many cockatoos, and heard even more of them - particularly at 6am on the dot every morning as they gathered above our hotel room. It would have been a terrible wake-up call (cockatoos are very loud), except Arden was very much awake (yet sleep-deprived) by 6am, so it made no difference to us.

Around the main city area are various metal sculptures to accompany a few landmarks (a judge by the courthouse, a policeman by the police station, etc.). My favourite was this koala and cockatoo by the Goulburn River walk.

One of my Australian friends highly recommended Gaffney's Pie Kitchen to me, and I wasn't disappointed. (These aren't dessert pies though - meat pies are an iconic Australian cuisine.) During our visit I had two vegetarian pies here and they were pretty amazing. Ben enjoyed a few of the meat pies as well. And Arden's review after a few bites of mine? "YUMMYYY. YUMMYYY."

One week was enough time to get a good taste of Seymour and experience many of the town's highlights. It's a fun area - I especially loved the gorgeous walking trails, and the art (both gallery works and public sculptures). I'm glad Ben asked me to come along on the trip, as I've missed my little small-town Australian adventures. Exploring (and traveling in general) is a bit different with a toddler in tow, but it's still manageable. Arden has always loved being out and about in her baby carrier, so she enjoyed the change of scenery as well as seeing the various animals, parks and beautiful views.

Thanks for a great time, Seymour! Perhaps we'll be back soon to see more... ;)

CK